Wednesday, 31 October 2012

A self medication post


It can be a scary word, huh!

Last week I had a really bad day. I was driving home and felt at a bit of a loss. What can I do? When things come crashing down, I no longer turn to food.....or cigarettes.....or alcohol.....or any of the other bad 'coping mechanisms' I tested out over the years. But I needed something! The fact that I felt I needed something to do, to console myself with, is perhaps another issue or blog post in itself :) But for now, I needed something - and I realised it can be hard when you're stopping all of your vices! My old addictions used to soothe me. What the hell am I supposed to do now??

On this particular day I ended up going to sleep for an hour as I just didn't know what else to do. I took the advice I gave a friend a couple of years ago. She had an awful day- she essentially lost her family on Christmas Day. She rang me and I was interstate and couldn't be there to help her. All I could suggest to her was to go to sleep. She was that devastated and in such a state that that's what I thought was best for starters. She wasn't in a fit state to do anything so I told her to lay there. I'm not likening myself to her situation, but last week I didn't know what to do- I couldn't (well, 'wouldn't') eat, smoke or drink etc., so I went to sleep. I don't sleep during the day! But I did. And then I saw a friend.

Why do we have addictions? My biggest (okay, one of my biggest) addictions has been to food. Yeah, how did that turn out for ya, Coco? ;) Why do we often develop unhealthy addictions? And also why do we seem to have addictions full stop? A life in moderation has never been my strong point.

The other frustrating thing is that addictions, or habits, seem to creep slowly back in. Just when we thought we'd banished them forever, they can easily rear their ugly head and rejoin our lives. 

One of my new addictions is blogging ;) - it has been completely therapeutic for me. Have a bad day? Blog. Have a great day? Blog. Any day in between....yeah, we'll blog. Exercise / training / running / events are slowly creeping up there too but I wouldn't give them the label of an addiction just yet. Blogging doesn't clog up my arteries, make me gain weight, drink-dial or potentially develop early onset emphysema. It's overall pretty healthy :) 

I'm having a really bad day today. So I've come here to blog. That is all. Thanks for reading my addiction tonight. :)

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