Tuesday 2 October 2012

Those magic changes... Bloggers Challenge #3



This week's Bloggers Challenge topic has got me thinking - it's a perfect topic for me at the moment - it completely resonated, thanks 77Noni (check out Noni's blog: http://fitandhappynotfatandhippy.com/

So this week the questions surround what changes we have made, and success. I've been thinking about this a lot today.  I don't know what helped me today but I had a good day.  Shock horror that I could actually have a good day!  It's not like that :)  It's just that this past couple of weeks have been particularly awful and today was set to be a shocker day at work (my workload officially tripled today) so to be honest I wasn't expecting much from life today.

I don't know if it was one of my brothers cooking me breakfast yesterday 'just because', or the pink butterfly stuffed toy that a friend randomly bought me (she knows nothing about this blog or my pink butterfly symbol!) :) or the online chat I had to a friend over the weekend, or the fact my boss was away today, or the motivational lecture I watched at lunch on YouTube or something that clicked when I read 2 friends blog posts today or my clean eating and training or something else or a mixture of these things, but the world seemed a little lighter and I'm seeing things a little more clearer today. 

This quote in the Bloggers Challenge is exactly what I was feeling all day:

"Some people dream of success... while others wake up and work hard at it."
(Author unknown)

Just like the quote I used at the start of this post.  That's how this journey started for me - I haven't had one defining and earth shattering moment that spun me into a weight loss marathon.  It was a build up of years of little moments (as quite accurately described in this post: Written by a fat girls heart).

But what I did do was that I decided to change.  Just like that.  What I guess I'm realising is that I have to feel this again to propel me forward.  The journey itself is long (and exciting - it sounds dumb but I'm having fun with it!) but it is long and it can be easy to forget how we started.  And there are points in the journey (as in life) where things do go wrong.  Things do fall apart.  I never professed to myself to be perfect.  As much as I expect of myself, I'm still learning.  I don't have all of the answers yet.  But what I have done is a lot of things:  I have been changing my mind and my body to extremes that I didn't even dare dream of just a few months ago.  Ok, life has been weighing me down in a huge way.  And I still cry over my back's 'love handles' in photos and make the wrong decisions sometimes.  But I have to remember HOW I started this journey.  I didn't want to 'feel like that anymore, or ever again', so I changed.

I know what I have to do.  Some days it will be hard.  What happened to my 'roll with the punches' mantra for this year?  It seems I've forgotten that lately. :)  I never promised myself an easy ride (who can?) but I did promise myself that I would change.  I know what to do.  I just have to do it.

Just like that.

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