So I lasted about 30 minutes after my last post before attempting to write this one. ;) See? I said this is like writing in a diary, I just had to get that stuff off my chest.
SO. It's currently Day 4 of Week 12 of Round 2 in 2012. Wow. Just a few days to go until the end of the round. I am super keen to get stuck into Round 3, but this week I've been thinking so much about how this round has been and how I have gone.
As I mentioned earlier, I was a bit disappointed on Wednesday. In essence, my results were not what I wanted. All I've been thinking about since, is that quote: "Don't complain about the results you didn't get by the work you didn't do." This quote couldn't be more true. Although it didn't say you couldn't be upset or beat yourself up! I haven't complained to anyone other than myself. I have been thinking about my stats and have been staring at my 'after' photo a lot (note to self: don't study before and after underwear photos on your phone in the lift at work (!) - that was a close call yesterday!).
My results are not exactly what I had planned. My distorted mind can't tell whether my photos show a difference - I think they do. Either way, I have been thinking about how this round has gone for me. Miss Perfectionist here promised that I would not be perfect. So why did I still beat myself up this week? I was never going to be a washboard stomached Size 10 after 12 weeks. Yes, I will be a washboard stomached Size 10! But it'll take a little longer :) I knew that, but I guess I also thought that I would have gone crazy into it and wowed myself. What I wasn't giving myself credit for, is that I am human. And I have 15 years of weight issues to quash. Mish is brilliant and 12WBT is a life saver and I am a smart girl. But there's no easy fix. I've had so many ups and downs this past 12-14 weeks and I thought that was bad. I didn't have a perfect round - I thought I had failed. But I lost weight, gained a mountain of knowledge and had so many wins. I've been soul searching and reflecting on this and it kind of made sense when I watched Mish's mindset video last night.
She said something along the lines of that she doesn't expect people to be perfect. She said that there will be ups and downs and blood, sweat and tears, and the clincher: and that that was perfect. I've thought about this heaps and I love this. The ups and downs? That is perfect. In my way of analysing this, it means that it's a whole lifestyle thing. It's a life thing. Life isn't perfect. We all have rollercoasters in our life, the highs, the lows, and as I have been saying, the good times and the punches. It's about managing things as a whole - being realistic - and being open minded - and being flexible. If we attempted to be perfect we would surely fail.
If there was a magic pill to 'solve' my weight issues then I would have bought it long before now. It was never going to be easy. But if we can get to a place where we're ok - and that we finally 'get it' - no matter how many fist pumps and falling down with skinned knees up and down episodes there are on the way, then I think we can say that we have won. And as Mish said, this is perfect.
Bring on Round 3!