Saturday, 21 December 2013

Shopping, Skippy, Small and Size 12

I got a little overwhelmed a couple of times today and I decided a blog post tonight would help me clarify my thoughts.

I was having a Christmas breakfast with some friends this morning and one of them raised his
The most special photo
glass to toast, and said that we weren't just celebrating Christmas, that we were also celebrating "Kate's amazing year" - and they all raised their glasses to me.  For someone who was not feeling emotional today at all, I had tears rise pretty quickly.  It was an incredibly sweet gesture that meant the world.  And it brought up a stack of thoughts and feelings.

Fast forward to lunch, I was having a Christmas lunch with another group of friends that ended in an impromptu shopping trip.  These girls were girls I had met through 12WBT.  We heard that a shop around the corner had nice, cheap dresses, so we piled into one car after lunch to go and check it out :)

What happened there was nothing short of special.  All 5 of us chose piles of things to try on and we took over the change rooms for a good 45min.  It's hard to explain but each one of

us kept coming out wearing our chosen dresses and pretty much each one not only fit, they looked great.  There was so much laughing and grinning and photos and high 5'ing going on, that other shoppers kept peering around the corner.

We've all lost a significant amount of weight and a couple of us commented, that we had never really had that before: a fun clothes shopping trip with friends.  I personally had one pretty cool experience a few years back, but apart from that, my history of clothes shopping is something I've blocked out of my memory.

I'm sure anyone who is reading this who has struggled with their weight knows what I'm talking about without me needing to be descriptive.

When you're Size 28 you don't have fun change room experiences. You cry in change rooms.  You freak out in change rooms when you realise the mirror is on the outside (why do they do that??)  You follow your skinnier friends into stores and hate that the shop assistant doesn't even acknowledge your prescence.  You end up not entering shops full stop - let alone find something to wear - let alone make it to the change rooms.  When you do make it, you have the only two things in the store that look like they could remotely fit, even though you know that they won't.  But you try them on anyway and then get crushed that nothing in the entire shopping centre fits you and you have nothing to wear to the party/Christening/wedding/lunch/*insert random occasion here*.  You end up spending extended periods of time in change rooms because you have to wait for your face to stop being so splotchy from crying so hard.  And trust me ----- these were the 'better' shopping trips.  I've had much worse.

They're the kind of clothes shopping trips I am used to.  So today was just magical.  This is what I missed out on when I was 19.  Shopping with your friends - feeling confident trying things on - having things fit - laughing - SMILING.  I had the hugest grin on my face all afternoon - I think we all did.  This is such an amazing photo as it represents us all having that experience that we had always never been able to have.  We had a ball.  And we ended up buying the same dresses!  Haha!

And the best bit for me - I tried on some shorts - and bought them!  I know!  My second pair in a
More shorts...and A SIZE 12 DRESS!
week!  These ones are casual - non exercise-y shorts...I thought I might be able to try and get used to wearing shorts and baring my legs if I am able to wear normal shorts out and about.  They felt amazing on.  And then - I tried on a dress.  It had a Size 12 or a Size 20 left so I tried on the Size 12.  IT FIT.  I could not believe it.  Tracey had the same experience just 20min. earlier and we high 5'd...then it happened to me!  I'm officially still a Size 14 but to start having the next size begin to fit you is the most incredible feeling.

That's when I started getting overwhelmed (in a great way!)  What a week of body size stuff.  In one week I have bought my first Size 12 dress...AND my first size 'Small' tops.  I'd bought (and worn in public!) my first shorts - then bought a second pair.  I had a normal, fun, clothes shopping experience.  

No description needed
I did heaps of my mini milestone challenges that I set myself too.  I did my school cross country :)  I climbed a mountain to have breaky on top (photos coming).  Oh - I tried kangaroo!  That was my Week 6 challenge and I did it!  I didn't mind it but I couldn't get my head around the fact that it was an animal so I could only eat a few mouthfuls.  These photos pretty much tell you the story, they need no words.  

1 year of boot camp
I also finished my first year of boot camps with Margie and it made me reflect on that too.  I've had the most incredible year there.  My fitness has improved a million fold and my body has changed shape.  Even when it was cold and dark outside or when I was sore and on my knees complaining or when I was so slow and feeling sorry for myself & just didn't think I could go on, I've loved every second. I've met the most amazing, supportive people in my boot camp group and we have so much fun- sometimes I laugh so much that I cry!  We totally have a ball there - everyone is amazing - (I felt comfortable enough to road test my shorts AKA undies in front of them this week so that's saying something!) 

Size 14 Disney Princess PJ's-from friends last night-fit out of the box!
And Margie has been phenomenal. She has been a rock, she understands us, she gets us, she is patient, she cheers for us, she makes us laugh, she kicks our ass, she then makes us laugh while kicking said ass (amazing talent!), she works us so damn hard. And she absolutely cares about us. She's helped me just so much - she believes in me - so many times I think I can't do it and she tells me I can. Then I do it.  And she never gives up on me.  I am so incredibly blessed to have an amazing trainer.

Anyway all of this stuff has just got me thinking of this whole year.  So much has happened and it's that time of year where we all start thinking about the year that was.  I have high hopes and dreams for 2014 and I can't wait to get into it but it wasn't until today where I realised that I haven't reflected on this year as a whole yet.  I don't want to let it
just go in a's been great and I want to settle with those thoughts over the next week.
Anyway - this is just a bit of a reflective chatter post - I'm sure there'll be more 'reflective sharing' coming soon.'s time to reflect.  Love Kate xo


  1. Well done Kate. You have so much to be proud of, I'm glad you're taking some time to reflect on your year. I'm a long time reader, first time commenter. You look incredible- I know how amazing it is to fit into normal clothes!!!! Enjoy your break :-)

  2. Great post Kate. You look so amazingly happy in each of these photos (except maybe the Kangaroo - I love eating kanga for dinner!! It's delicious). And your writing reads with happiness as well. I know it was a yr plus ago but am happy to see you happy. Funny coincidence - I have a random spotify recommended playlist playing and the words of the song playing as I'm reading this goes "you're the butterfly you wish to be".